Why are parents blamed for their kids behavior?

Posted on 05:28, August 29th, 2008 by
admin
It is the child that acts a certain way in an environment. A child can do something for attention, yet in the same environment a sibling of the same age and gender can react totaly different. People blame parents… and then the parents blame themselves… can’t it be ok that we are all doing our best…. why must we be blamed or cristisized if our child acts a certain way?
Face it we are products of our environment. When a small child acts out in public people will look the other way, or try to sooth the child. When they are tots it is acceptable for them to throw fits, or cry for no reason. When the child is nine ten eleven even at five or six the public expects you to have instilled proper behavior skills in them. When a seven year old is throwing a fit in a store people expect to see you either correct them or remove them. Its not that people think you arent doing your best, they think that you should handle the right now to their satifaction. Think about it this way, you are a parent, their parent, and NO_ONE has the right to judge your parenting skills. We can only hope and pray that they dont totally embarrass us, and when they do, all we can do is grin and thank god that we have them at all.
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Technorati Tags: Child Behaviour Problems, children behaviors, kids behavior, Toddler Behavior
There's no set formula for why kids act like that. Sometimes it is the parent's fault, but not always.
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People are a result of two possible things. Nature and nurture. When a person is a child the parents are the biggest contributor to these two things.
If you really cannot control your brats then please hang a sign around their neck that others are free to whoop them.
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Uhhh…yeah parents can only do their best but,it is the parents job to teach their children how to behave and be human beings, with manners and humility, and tact. You bring a life into this world and you have to mold a portion of their personality..thats your job. You cant like, send them to school and expect educators to teach your children to behave in public and like, chew with their mouth closed..and not throw tantrums..and such.
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Because we are supposed to instill values and principles in our children. Children are reactionary.
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Sometimes parents are the root of the problems.
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"We ARE the people our parents warned us about!"
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JB
because home environment is where they get the majority of the impact of social behavior.
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Kids are still small and do not know anything yet so parents are blamed for their kids behavior.
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If there is indeed one kid that's acting out and the siblings are fine, then it's probably not the parents' fault, then it's probably something else like ADHD or something… some kids are just really difficult, just like you can get a very nice kid growing up in a ghetto who'll never get in trouble and ends up going to university you can also have a criminal growing up in a very nice family. But most of the time it's the parents who determine the way a child behaves, at least when it's still younger, preschool and such… I am not saying it's easy but when brats are just running around and the parents are nowhere in sight then yes it is their fault. The older a child gets the harder it gets to control them but if the base is right -where the child has been taught about values but also hasn't been held so tight that he wants to do anything to escape first chance he gets- then chances are definitely greater he'll be able to resist temptations when he goes out on his own, exploring town, hanging out at school, etc. Parents aren't the only influence in a child's life but they are a very great one, especially before school age!
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Alot of the reson a child acts a certain way is how the parents raised (or didn't raise) them. Of course other things infuence, but parents are the main influence. If the kid is a whiny out of control brat, chances are the parent did a suck job of parenting. When a child is small, you teach them how to behave through your own actions. As they get bigger, they choose things for themselves. But that foundation will always be there. If the kid has a good foundation, chances are they'll turn out ok.
3 children running around and yelling at a restaurant is bad parenting.
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Face it we are products of our environment. When a small child acts out in public people will look the other way, or try to sooth the child. When they are tots it is acceptable for them to throw fits, or cry for no reason. When the child is nine ten eleven even at five or six the public expects you to have instilled proper behavior skills in them.
When a seven year old is throwing a fit in a store people expect to see you either correct them or remove them.
Its not that people think you arent doing your best, they think that you should handle the right now to their satifaction.
Think about it this way, you are a parent, their parent, and NO_ONE has the right to judge your parenting skills. We can only hope and pray that they dont totally embarrass us, and when they do, all we can do is grin and thank god that we have them at all.
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Mother of two nurse to thousands
I think it depends on what the kid is doing and how old they are. I'm not really sure what situations you are referring to. Sure there are kids that are hyper and may not have control over themselves at appropriate times. This may be a short circuit in their wiring so to speak. I can truly empathize with these parents. Lets face it all parents have been in a situation where their child has acted out and although they may try to handle the situation it backfires and they end up looking like a totally inept parent. However, I see kids lie, cuss, act foul, tease others and know way too much about adult things at a young age. These kids lack respect for other people. I would be more likely to pin this behavior on the parents. Sure, I would feel bad if the parent really was trying to do their best. However most kids that act out like that have parents that just don't give a crap. They are home alone after school, have no interests, and are allowed to watch and do anything they want. Too many parents are just really immature themselves and don't even realize how their kids are behaving. While you may be doing your best, unfortunately many parents out there aren't.
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BECAUSE IT IS THE PARENT'S JOB TO RAISE THEIR CHILD AND INSTILL MORALS!!
MY MOTHER RAISED FOUR CHILDREN ON HER OWN. ALL FOUR OF US WERE NEVER IN TROUBLE AND ARE QUITE SUCCESSFUL TODAY. MY UNCLES RAISED THEIR CHILDREN IN FANCY HOMES TWO PARENT HOUSEHOLDS, YET NEGLECTED TO PUT THEIR FOOTS DOWN. NOW THEY ARE WHINING BECAUSE THEIR SONS ARE FACING DRUG CHARGES, BEEN ARRESTED MORE TIMES THAN SNOOP DOG, HAVE CHILDREN BY DIFFERENT GIRLS OUT OF WEDLOCK AND HAVE DROPPED OUT OF HIGH SCHOOL. EVEN MY AUNT'S SON IS FACING SERIOUS PRISON TIME FOR A CRIME I WOULDN'T DARE CONFESS ON HERE. THE FUNNY THING IS THAT MY MOTHER'S SIBLINGS USED TO TALK ABOUT HER BECAUSE SHE WAS A SINGLE MOM RAISING 3 GIRLS AND A BOY. THEY EVEN SAID MY BROTHER WOULD TURN OUT GAY. WELL, HE IS 27, HAS A WONDERFUL JOB, A WIFE AND 2 BEAUTIFUL CHILDREN. YES, THE CHILDREN HAVE THE SAME MOTHER.
NOW THESE SAME SIBLINGS ARE CALLING MY MOM FOR PRAYER AND ADVICE ON WHAT TO DO!!
MY MOTHER STARTED DISCPLINING US WHILE WE WERE IN DIAPERS. SHE NEVER TOOK ANY MESS!!
OVERALL, IT IS HOW PARENTS RAISE THEIR CHILDREN THAT DETERMINES HOW THEY TURN OUT. IF YOU HAVE LENIENT PARENTS WHO TRY TO BE COOL AND PARENTS THAT HAVE NO CONTROL OVER THEIR CHILDREN, YOU WILL GET OUT OF CONTROL CHILDREN AND IT IS THE PARENT'S FAULT.
AS MY IDOL RICHARD PRYOR (RIP) USED TO SAY REGARDING MOTHERS WHO COMPLAIN ABOUT THEIR CHILDREN BEING OUT OF CONTROL: "BI!@#C!, THAT'S YO FAULT!!
LOL!!
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Because parents are supposed to teach children how to act and how not to act.If the child is acting up, and the parents don't do anything about it, then they are condoning bad behaviour, so they are to blame.
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